How much should your child know about the divorce?

On Behalf of | Feb 17, 2022 | Child Custody |

Going through a divorce is a difficult process for everyone in the family. This includes your child, as well. You, as a parent, likely have many questions about how to handle dealing with a child during the earliest parts of a divorce.

One question you may ask is, how much should you actually tell your child about the divorce itself?

Where do you draw the line?

Psychology Today discusses the topic of discussing divorce with your children. One of the most important things when discussing divorce is to know where to draw your boundary lines. Children are more perceptive than they seem, so outright lying about the divorce itself is never a good idea. For example, do not try to tell them that you and your spouse simply need some time apart when you fully intend to divorce.

On the other hand, children do not need to see and hear every nitty-gritty detail about the split, either. They likely do not need to know the reason behind the divorce itself, especially if it is personal or above the level that a child could understand.

Prepare for questions

Prepare to field questions, too. Your child will have a lot of them, and you want to know what level of comfort to stay at when answering them. Just how much are you willing to divulge and how much will you keep to yourself?

Remember that even older children are still your children and you should treat them as such, not as peers or friends. This is especially true in a divorce context, where you may feel tempted to lean on them for emotional support. Remember that they need this, too, and that this is a difficult time for all.